Attitude Project - Debby Laird

The discomfort leading up to Debby Laird’s doctor appointment was palpable. 

Debby, a teacher in her mid-40s, had suffered from recurring kidney stones her whole life, but otherwise was relatively healthy. After struggling for months with fatigue and flu-like symptoms, she knew she had to see a doctor. And after tests, she was shocked to learn her kidneys were underperforming and she would need a transplant within 12 months.

Thinking about her then 9 year-old son, Debby struggled to understand how this could be, and more importantly, how she would handle the challenge before her. But that challenge quickly became far more urgent, as what came next nearly cost her life.

A Trip To The ER

After only a few months Debby’s doctor called her with an urgent message to go to the ER as soon as possible. Her latest test results indicated that her kidneys were failing. After arriving, the doctors confirmed that her kidneys had stopped functioning and she needed dialysis to remove the build up of waste in her system. At the same time, her dad was diagnosed with multiple myoma, an untreatable form of cancer. Debby felt lost and confused and as if she was punched in the gut. 

Dialysis is a procedure in which blood is removed from the body, filtered into a machine and then reinserted into the body. Anyone who has experienced it — even second-handedly through a loved one of their own — can attest to the discomfort and depression it can cause. Debby was not immune from its effects. 

Debby wept through all 3 hours of her first dialysis appointment. Wept because of the uncertainty surrounding her — new medicines and intimidating machines, a mountain of lifestyle changes and seemingly insurmountable bad news. And then it dawned on her: Debby had two more appointments that week alone. She knew it’d be a long road forward.

A Moment of Clarity

Following her first appointment, Debby realized she stood little chance unless she changed her attitude. She set forth determined to arrive at each appointment with a big smile and do whatever she could to make it contagious for her nurses. She refused to let her turmoil taint her interactions with them or anyone else. 

Despite her renewed commitment to a positive attitude, Debby still couldn’t shake the distressing feeling that overcame her following a phone call from her doctor indicating something was wrong. As it turned out, her kidneys were damaged because of hyperoxaluria, a genetic disorder that causes the liver to pump excess oxalate into her system.The excess oxalate shut down her kidneys. In other words, before Debby could have a kidney transplant, she would need a liver transplant to correct the disorder. Without it, her new kidney would suffer the same fate as her damaged ones. 

Being on the waitlist for a life-saving organ is like waiting for a ship lost at sea. It should be coming any day, but each day passes with no word on its location or when it will actually arrive. Months passed, with Debby going to dialysis 3 days a week at 5:00 in the morning to get to her students on time.

Meet Kelsey

All the while, Debby had been mentoring a young woman named Kelsey, with whom she quickly became close. Debby shared her wisdom from years as a teacher, encouraging Kelsey to grow in her skills and faith. They often spent afternoons discussing life’s struggles and how to use God’s plan as a guide to stay positive and even in the midst of them. 

She continued teaching, raising her son, and mentoring Kelsey without missing a beat and never letting on just how much it hurt or how scared she was through it all. Waiting, day after day, for the all important call that they found a liver that would quell her hyperoxaluria. The liver was just the first step, but it would lead to being able to receive new kidneys, and she’d be able to say goodbye to the dialysis center for good and finally be able to be a “normal person” again, or so she thought.

When Debby did receive that call, she was told she’d need to be at the hospital within two hours or risk losing out on the transplant. She wasted little time: she packed, kissed her son and hailed a ride as soon as she could. This trip would change her life and she was not prepared to miss out on the opportunity offered to her.

The Liver Transplant

After a 4-hour wait, Debby was ushered into surgery.  The transplant went well and Debby was out of surgery in the time that the doctors expected, but within a few hours the doctors knew something was wrong. Debby was dying. Her body had rejected the new liver and the doctors and hospital staff started doing everything in their power to keep Debby alive and find a new liver. 

Over the next days, Debby’s husband wrote a desperate letter that he shared with the congregation of the family’s church, the school where Debby worked, their son’s baseball team, and family and friends across the internet and social media begging for people to go to the hospital to be tested as a possible match. Since the liver can regenerate itself, a donor could give part of theirs and save Debby’s life. Everyone that knew her and even complete strangers were desperate to help save her life. To save her 9 year old son from growing up without his mom. To help a teacher who inspired so many young people. Though dozens answered her husband’s call to action, no match was found. The doctors called Debby’s husband and told him the hard truth. She would die within the next 12-24 hours if they didn’t find a liver. This was likely his last chance to see her alive. 

The date was now December 31, 2017. 

What Happened Next…

With just hours left, Debby’s husband anxiously approached the ringing phone: “We have a match!” was all he could hear, all he needed to hear. They were prepping the OR for surgery. Debby had a chance.

Time stood still.

Debby’s body accepted the new liver and her body began to stabilize. She awoke unaware of how close to death she had been. 

Debby healed from the surgery and the harrowing brush with death. She eventually returned home and resumed a somewhat normal life, though her triweekly dialysis appointments continued as she still needed to treat her kidneys. 

Friendship Blossoms

Meanwhile, Kelsey had missed her mentor and was excited to have Debby back. Rejuvenated, Debby often stopped by Kelsey’s classroom, where they’d talk for hours. Their relationship grew in the months that followed, and they became very close friends. 

One day, while at a dialysis appointment, Debby received a text urging her to come to Kelsey’s room after school. Curious, but eager to see her friend, Debby ventured to the school as soon as her appointment ended. She was greeted by a curiously giggly Kelsey, who ultimately had to leave the room to gather herself. When Kelsey returned, she bore a Post-It note with a simple message: “I want to help you.” Then, she left again. 

Confused, Debby waited for Kelsey to return. Did she want to help with Debby’s class, or drive her to appointments?  When Kelsey returned, she finally mustered the strength to speak. “I want to give you one of MY kidneys,” she said. “You’ve helped me so much at school; now, I want to help you.” 

Because of her rare blood type, Debby was skeptical that Kelsey would be a match, but loved her friend for the thoughtfulness and selflessness.  But following Kelsey’s test, the doctor told Debby he had rarely seen a blood match as perfect as the duo’s. 

The Kidney Transplant

A few months later, lying in hospital beds in two different rooms, Debby and Kelsey were video chatting with each other. Fully garbed up in hospital gowns ready to go back for the surgery that would join them together for the rest of their lives. Kelsey about to give a kidney to save Debby’s life and Debby about to receive one of the greatest gifts she could ever imagine. 

The subsequent surgery was hugely successful and both Debby and Kelsey recuperated quickly. So quickly in fact that they both demanded to see each other immediately. Though the hospital staff couldn’t swing it then and there, Kelsey was determined: she clothed herself, grabbed her IV pole, and walked to Debby’s room! 

Debby and Kelsey’s bond has only strengthened since that fateful procedure. The two are practically sisters and still see each other regularly. 

What Is Attitude?

I asked Debby how she remained positive throughout everything that you went through. Simply, “My faith in Christ.” 

Debby added that if she had projected a negative attitude, then she wouldn’t have been a light to the world. Since Day 1, Debby Laird has been a fighter, working hard to shine her light on others and encourage them to choose positivity as well. 

“Every morning before I get out of bed, I ask Christ to lead me through my day and to keep me positive. If you’re not a fighter and not positive, things can creep in and [Satan] can make you feel like everything is going to fall apart.”

With a fully functioning liver and kidney, Debby now lives much more comfortably. She still teaches, and she finds great joy in raising her 11-year-old son and supporting him as he plays for an All-Star baseball team. Her strength comes from her conscious decision to choose a positive attitude everyday.

To hear Debby’s story from her own mouth, check out her video on YouTube by clicking the button!